I think I can pretty much distill the composition of my friendship pool down this: I am more 87% more likely to be friends with an individual if I discover the following...
...they have a medium-large dog.
...they can speak in Arrested Development quotes
...have or are pursuing a graduate degree
...they are a Mormon who does at least one minor "sinful" thing (Like occasional swearing or eating coffee flavored ice cream)
...they are a feminist
...have played Katamari Damacy and its progeny
...read XKCD comic
...read Terry Pratchett, because just the right kind of nerds typically do
...define themselves as politically moderate
...live to eat, love to eat, and allow themselves to eat
...can comfortably and openly joke about sex. (Not to be confused with "makes dirty jokes," which is something entirely different)
...give me a shoulder rub...provided that the person is a close acquaintance first.
Now, this doesn't mean I exclude people who don't fit the above characteristics. It's just math and chemistry and exposure, really. Now the characteristics described below make me take a step back: I am 39% less likely to be friends with someone if...
...they stink
...they like to talk about their wealth--either directly or through implication
...they are chronically late
...they try to sell me anything
...they take any time out of their busy schedules for planned viewing of the following TV shows: Two and a Half Men, King of Queens, Everybody Loves Raymond, Reba, any smutty, non-cooking reality TV show
...they define themselves as belonging to the tea party
...they say or believe any variation of "Corporations are evil."
...they post more than 1 melancholy Facebook status update in a row
Hmmm. I think I hit the big ones. What about you folks?
3 comments:
I am less likely to be friends with someone who
-Makes major grammar errors on a regular basis
-Gossips extensively
-All persons who have flabby hands and irritating laughs
-Describes patriotism as the highest value
-Expresses admiration for Sarah Palin
I am more likely to be friends with someone who
-Makes light of the tragedies in their lives through inappropriate dark humor
I barely make the first category, I have a graduate degree. Thanks for coming to my house anyway.
I think some of it has to do with self-selection. You gravitate to people with similar interests and ideologies as you—not as a matter of course, perhaps, but it seems to be how these things works.
If a potential friend has nothing in common with me—no common interests, no shared TV show viewing, no ideological commonalities—I end up fighting or arguing with him or her the whole time. I might find them interesting or intellectually stimulating, but not somebody I want sitting on my couch until 2 AM.
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