Entitled to your Opinion

I often stay up late because someone on the internet is wrong. I can't help it. I enjoy debate and I write better than I speak. The internet allows me to say it like I mean it without having to be diplomatic and preserve relationships. Yuk.

I'm harsh. I get it. But there are certain defenses that make you sound absolutely pathetic. The variation I read most often is a whine about "being entitled to an opinion" or "respecting an opinion." I call this opinion entitlement confusion. Here's the deal, internet: While you are entitled to hold a sexist/racist/bigoted/small-minded opinion, I do not have to respect it.

Now there are times I respect alternate opinions. But it's usually because those opinions are well-reasoned, well-argued, considerate, moderate, inabsolute, conditional. Like, I can see how your candidate's solution to a social ill is a possibility, but I just don't think it actually will work. I respect that opinion.

Or I can even tolerate and respect someone who is self-aware of their bias or background. Most of my friends and family aren't on-board with a female priesthood, but they typically argue some logical (within the constraints of the religion, anyway) reason such as "It's just God's will." Okay, I'll go there with you. I respect that opinion.

However, if I think your views on public breastfeeding are sexist, undermining, demeaning, or just impractical, I don't have to follow up my disgust with, "but I respect your opinion that breastfeeding is immodest." If you make any public statement or argument, back it up. Don't rely on this sissy cop-out that I'm not respecting your views. Because you're probably right. I don't.

Here's another fantastic example of opinion entitlement confusion, and the one that sparked this entire thought. First some background: A shop owner in NJ refused to sell a gay woman a wedding dress. People rallied to support her by making bad reviews for the store on Yelp!. But one lonely commenter had this to say:

So it's not ok for someone who believes gay 'marriage' is wrong to stick up for whatthey [sic] believe in, but it is ok for a 'gay' person to say it's discrimination? I don't tthink [sic] so, that doesn't make sense.

If your brain just froze a little, you're not alone. There are no words. I tried to follow her logic and create some statement for why the comment is so completely stupid, but as I did my brain came to a shuddering halt. My organs briefly ceased functioning. I had to wake myself up from the stupor her stupidity induced within me.

So, set aside for a moment the grotesque, gear-grinding, failure of logic. No matter how you slice it, the woman who was refused service was discriminated against. Whether you think it's just or not has no relevance to the truth of the discrimination.

And one final thought before I go--but is it your experience that everyone with stupid opinions has terrible spelling and grammar? Or is that just my bias?